Paul Fitzpatrick: December 2024

Is a bloody Johnny Seven gun!

Yep, six decades on I have a recurring dream of waking up and finding that magnificent howitzer under the Xmas tree.

I’m not sure why as kids we were so obsessed with guns, weapons and general warfare in the era of ‘Give Peace a Chance’, perhaps it was a way of bonding with parents & grandparents who’d all experienced the war in some scenario or another? A more likely explanation is that the 60’s toy market was flooded with combat related merchandise…. Airfix models of fighter planes, tanks and warships, Matchbox toy soldiers of every regiment known to man, and of course replica toy weapons.

Life back then was pretty simple, the world was divided into good guys and bad guys, Cowboys and Indians being a prime example.
We’d be tooled up and let loose with replica guns, holsters, bows & arrows and the odd tomahawk. ‘Best Man Fall’ was a popular pastime when we tired of chasing each other and gave up bickering about who shot who first.

If it wasn’t Cowboys vs Indians it was the British vs the Germans, or the Men from Uncle vs T.H.R.U.S.H. (no giggling at the back), crikey we even played out the American Civil War – Unionists vs Confederates, which on reflection was a strange one as we were too young to understand who held the moral high ground in that particular conflict.

Then Action Man came along and instead of reenacting battles we were battling to fit fiddly Army fatigues onto a wee castrated action figure.

In the midst of this testosterone boost I came across the holy-grail of (toy) weapons, a piece of kit that could blow any Smith & Wesson rifle or Luger pistol out of the water…. the mighty Johnny Seven gun.

I first laid eyes on it in one of the American comic books my aunt Marjie used to send me from New York… Casper the Friendly Ghost, Richie Rich, Archie & Friends, Justice League of America and the like.

I loved those trans-Atlantic comic books, especially the cool adverts they featured for weird and wonderful stuff not yet available in the UK, like… X-Ray Specs, live seahorses, full size Frankenstein monsters and of course the Johnny Seven Gun, a one man cacophony of terror.
My heart was set, this beauty had the lot…. grenades, anti-tank rockets, armour piercing shells, missiles, and best of all, it was coming to the UK.

My campaign for this molded weapon of mass destruction started early, letters to Santa, three word responses to anyone who asked (what I wanted for Christmas) and in particular to any department store Santa who’s knee I graced.
Pointedly, my letter to Santa which normally filled an A5 sheet of paper only had one item on it, this was no time for subtlety, if I had to sacrifice my beloved Oor Wullie annual to make a point then so be it.

Talk about visualisation techniques and putting things out to the universe, I was way ahead of my time, and counting the days until Johnny and I would be as one.

There was zero doubt in my mind what was awaiting me on Christmas morning as I started tearing the wrapping from the gun length box, but wait this was no Johnny Seven Gun, it was a different gun…. the wrong gun!

It was something called the ‘Gun That Shoots Around the Corner’

How could Santa have got it so wrong? Had I been such an annoying little dick that year??

Doing my utmost to put on a brave face I could hear my mum’s voice…. “What a lovely gift from Santa, ooh it can shoot round corners, that’s nice”.

I love my mum dearly but she didn’t get it, how could she? In today’s urban warzone, shooting around corners wasn’t a thing, Grenade Launchers, Tommy Guns and Anti-Bunker Missiles were the currencies we traded in.

As it turned, out no one else had a gun that could shoot around corners so it was a bit of a novelty, and of course I realised pretty quickly that I was being an ungrateful little twat and had much to be thankful for.

I’m guessing they probably tried pretty hard to get me a Johnny Seven and when they couldn’t, they got what they considered to be the next best thing.

As parents we’ve all been there… Beanie Babies in the 90s anyone?

I know for a fact Johnny Seven’s must have been scarce, we all wanted one but I only knew one lad blessed to receive one, and of course if he happened to be loitering around a corner he was dead meat now, despite his heavy artillery.
I did point this out to him on more than one occasion and charitably offered a swap, but he said he’d just be more mindful of loitering around corners now!

By the following Xmas I was into football so footie kit and subbuteo took over, however, I always think of the Johnny Seven as the one that got away.

Out of interest I looked up the price of a pre-owned Johnny Seven to see how much it would set me back – £1,400 (as below)…. even as a 9 year old I knew it was a treasure!

Funnily enough, as hard as I tried I couldn’t find a resale market for the ‘Gun That Shoots Around the Corner’…. maybe they’re priceless?

Lot 177

Boxed Johnny Seven O.M.A One Man Army Toy Gun
Boxed Johnny Seven O.M.A One Man Army Toy Gun, 6025 distributed by Deluxe-Topper Toys, seven guns in one, grenade launcher, armor-piercing shell, anti-tank rocket, retractable Bi-Pod, repeating rifle with shells, automatic pistol and Tommy gun, in mint condition, with a near mint original box, with card insert, two instruction leaflets. This is the best you can get, a rare superb example of this 1960’s iconic toy gun.

This can only be shipped in the United Kingdom:

Lot closed – Winning bid:£1,400