Paul Fitzpatrick: December 2024

I’ve always felt there are four stages to the Christmas journey.

Stage 1 is reindeers, elfs, letters to Santa and how does the big lad get down the chimney?
Stage 2 is ‘we know Santa’s a hoax but we’re still getting gifts & holidays, so we’re over it’
Stage 3 is ‘I’m getting too old for this, it’s a capitalist racket and the primary cause of ulcers’
Stage 4 is seeing Christmas through the eyes of your kids, grand kids etc and being touched again by the magic of it all.

At this time of year it’s stage 2 I reflect on, triggered by songs we still hear today, 50 years on from hearing them blast out of mobile disco speakers in various church/school halls.

They were social events we planned and looked forward to, weeks in advance.

Although there was only a few years between them, my first and last Xmas school disco’s couldn’t have been more different.

The first one I attended in 1970 was when I was 12. I had zero input into what I was wearing but I do remember wide trousers and a shirt collar as big as Dumbo’s ears. I’m pretty sure there was a tie that matched the shirt (identically!) and I sported a hairstyle that could best be described as natural.
This was prior to the era of pop/glam Xmas songs, although I can still remember a lot of the music from that night – Band of Gold, I Hear You Knocking, When I’m Dead and Gone, Black Night, Tears of a Clown, Paranoid, Crackling Rose, to name a few.

Much to everyone’s embarrassment there had been some country dancing lessons carried out prior to the event so I’m guessing the evening would have been a Ceilidh/Disco mix of sorts, although the Ceilidh part of the evening is a blank to me.
I only remember dancing with one girl and amazingly we won a prize in some kind of disco dance-off where they eliminated couples from the dance floor until we were the last couple standing.
All I can say is that Miss Bodil Jack must have been a hell of a dancer!

My last school Xmas disco in 1973 was a bit different.

Firstly I was very much in control of what I wore (denim dungarees from Slack Shak) and although only three years had passed the rituals as well as the clothes had changed significantly.

There were no ‘lifts’ to the venue from parents now because the preamble was a key part of the evening, meeting up somewhere near an off license, asking older lads to acquire some beer & cider on your behalf and consuming snakebites somewhere discreetly.
We never drank that much, a few cans at most but the constitution of a fifteen year old is a lottery and whilst a couple of snakebites would have no effect on some, others were rolling around like drunken sailors.

Although we weren’t quite as shy and monosyllabic as we had been in 1970 we obviously felt the need for a bit of Dutch courage, which as things turned out wasn’t actually required, as it was mistletoe that did all the heavy lifting.

Yup, who would have thought a parasitic plant, with poisonous berries and mystical powers could empower the shyest among us to snog someone we’d hardly uttered three words to before?

The transformation was incredible.
Upon sight of the berried twigs bashful boys transformed into Warren Beatty and shrinking violets, Mae West.

By 73, mobile discos were awash with Xmas songs – Slade’s ‘Merry Xmas Everybody’ had just pipped Wizard’s ‘I Wish it Could Be Christmas Every Day’ to #1…. who’s gonna be listening to that in 50 years time we thought!

Once again I can remember a lot of the songs from that Xmas disco in the school hall – Streetlife, Pool Hall Richard, Nutbush City Limits, Keep on Trucking, Joybringer and Monster Mash, to name a few.

I’m not sure if they played slow dances or moonies at those discos but it didn’t stop the mistletoe from being brandished and snogging on the dancefloor seemed quite natural in those days although all contact would come to an abrupt end as soon as the song finished.

Weirdly, in all my years of Xmas discos I don’t think I ever saw a male of the species brandishing mistletoe, you’d think it would be a no-brainer but I guess we were either too thick or too lazy.

There was a time when I was snotty about those Xmas songs but when I hear Slade or Wizzard or Elton John belting out those 70s Xmas hits now it transports me back to those teenage Xmas nights and as Roy Wood said – I wish it could be Christmas every day!

Here’s a Christmas playlist to get you in the mood…..