(Post by John Allan from Bridgetown, Western Australia – July 2022.)

OK everyone, welcome to SJAnon. Take a seat. I know it’s hard but would you like to start us off John.

I’m John and I’m a Smooth Jazzaholic. I once bought a Kenny G album.

*AUDIBLE GASPS*

We’re here for you John.

I blame Taxi. Not the rank of black cabs outside Glasgow Central Station, the TV series that was compulsory weekly family viewing back in the late 70s . The laid back theme hooked me with it’s child like recorder intro and its dulcet electric piano melody. It’s written and performed by Bob James and is originally called Angela. It only became the theme tune after the 3^rd episode. It was chosen to introduce a character of the same name but the producers adopted it in favour of the original tune Touchdown, the title track of Bob James‘ 6^th album release.

I should have seen the signs. I bought Taking Off  by Dave Sanborn in 1975 thinking it just a funky sax album.

Then George Benson’s Breezin’ in ’76 because I had a cassette of him and flautist Joe Farrell. I didn’t know he could sing !

Louie De Palma and his group of cabbies came along to seduce us in ’78.

The following year, an instrumental Morning Dance reached number 17 in the UK by a band called Spyro Gyra. A jaunty little number, all steel drums and marimbas with a catchy alto sax melody. Close your eyes with a Malibu pina colada and a sun lamp and you are there dancing with the beautiful people on a Caribbean beach!

Then came the 80s. We were cast adrift from the safe harbour of our wonder years of the 70s, confused, rudderless, floating, all at sea ! ( I’m straying into Yacht music territory now)

And then it happened. I heard the siren soprano sax call of a certain Kenneth Bruce Gorelick playing Songbird. I crashed on to the rocks.

I bought a Kenny G album !

Oh the shame !!

In my defence, I took it home, listened to it a couple of times then promptly hid it at the back of the family LP collection behind the Bernard Cribbins‘ singles. I then mainlined a pharmacy of funk, a transfusion of jazz fusion, a rectal lavage of rhythm and……………………no, that’s taking it too far !

My Kenny G spot would never again be defiled………………………….that’s definitely too far !!

Smooth jazz ? I don’t think so.

Kenny G walks into a lift and says – This place really rocks !